"The prosecution of Rod Blagojevich is “a tale of sound and fury, signifying nothing,” a lawyer for the former governor told the jury during opening statements at his retrial, quoting Shakespeare and touching on a key theme for the defense." The Tragedy of Macbeth: SCENE V. Dunsinane. Within the castle.: Full of Sound and Fury The Tragedy of Macbeth (free for Amazon Kindle) The Tragedy of Macbeth (paperback) The Sound and the Fury: The Corrected Text (William Faulkner novel)
MACBETH
She should have died hereafter;
There would have been a time for such a word.
To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time,
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.
Enter a Messenger
Thou comest to use thy tongue; thy story quickly.
Wanted - Invisible Leader for Underground Populist Data Acquisition Organization
Must have European 'James Bond' meets 'Scandinavian Spy' meets 'Andy Warhol' art school elegance.
Almost perfect English helpful, but retains mysterious accent.
With a straight face, must be able to claim no knowledge of stolen sources as effectively as Ronald Reagan and Contra.
Must prefer free speech, yet himself may hide any and all skeletons, picadillos, whores and rape conquests. Supporters will hush these as important, less essential than freedom of speech.
Remember, we need a figure head, not an active leader. Hackers will do the real work.
No women need apply, thank you. We are proudly a misogynous organization. We use women; we do not let them lead.
With a title like that to a blog post, you might thing I am implying Illinois is an ethical state. Naturally, it is known that it is ethical, though which system it plays by is not clear.
With the Madigan Dynasty beginning, the Daley Dynasty ending, the string of corrupt or screwed up governors, a sitting United States president who barely worked in the Senate before campaigning full-time, a former Chief of Staff who quit midway into the admistration to begin his own non-corrupt mayoral bid, Reverend Jesse Jackson and Son and their mistresses, and a essentially bankrupt state --
Wait? Did I imply a state with bad ethics?
No, we, the City of Big Shoulders, want to lead the State of Illinois to look more like Detroit, MI or New York, NY with a dash of New Orleans, LA.
We are corrupt. No one believes Barack Obama is tainted with Chicago corruption, naturally, having only served briefly before his White House campaign began, but most everyone realizes we bribe, lie, steal to get things done. It isn't just the unions, priests, corporations, and paperboys who are suspect. Everyone. Blago is just the voice of a corrupt generation. Dare we call him guilty? Well, yeah, if that's the verdict.
Good thing is not "the Giannoulias seat." And definitely not Hillary's seat. No one wants to see that.
Rod and Robert Blagojevich lived happily on Democraticus Corruptus, the fourth moon of Pluto, the body of land formerly known as a planet. Rod, ever the wise brother, saw his planet soon being recalled by the Astro Naming Committee. Something about brake pedals not working, and concerns whether or not Armando Galarraga's game was properly named 'perfect'. (Baseball was very popular in the DC).
Noting the trouble Toyota had recently been in, Rod left for Earth and assumed a human physical body. However, limited into his access of information, thanks to the many light years difference in distance, all Rod saw were images dating back to the 1950s. Elvis Presely was the most famous, the most popular human, and was singing "I'm All Shook Up." Rod thought this Elvis guy was the quintessential human. Hence, the hair.
Meanwhile, poor Robert was lonely back on their home moon. The Democraticus Corruptus leadership, a brotherhood (even the women were referred to as brothers there, being a genderless society), only worked with relatives. Rod was gone, leaving Robert brotherless, and as they say in his world, "Screwed since you ain't a Daley."
Robert, seeing that Rod had left for the world of "All Shook Up," decided too to come down. The warrring party against Democraticus Corruptus, the usually impotent Republicus Pieceacrappus, calls this a "the Blagojevichian Shakedown." People on Earth would pay the Blago Brothers money to stop. Even their messiah, the Barack Obama, left the state, unwilling to hear their tune.
Death, like life, is for sale. Coward convict Christopher Kelly looked at his days gambling and dancing feloniously with Rod Blagovich and self-euthanized.
Kelly, a roofing contractor from Chicago's southern suburbs, had already pleaded guilty to $1.3 million in tax fraud and swindling two airlines in connection with $8.5 million in contracts for work on their hangars at O'Hare International Airport. He had been sentenced to three years on the tax charge and had signed a plea agreement under which he was to be sentenced to five years in the O'Hare contracts case. Those were to be served consecutively. source: Washington Post
A loser pretending to have class, all he ended up doing is showing himself to be a quitter. One more corrupt thug sells his soul, and dies realizing he never had one.
No one ever respects a corrupt official, especially in Democratic stronghold Illinois where corruption is a way of life. No one respects a suicide monkey either.
Republicans have Betty Loren-Maltese back in the news, though. She's the former mayor of Cicero, Illinois. More corruption. She needs a job, so if your toilet is dirty, look her up.
Sometimes, there's nothing that can be added to make something funnier.
Illinois, as most know, is the land of corrupt politicians. Most recently, they put a president in the White House. Barack Obama has yet to be indicted for any crimes, but mostly, in Illinois, it never happens anyway. Republicans are feeding the jail population as much as Democrats, so no one is left of out of the fame of shame.
Rod Blagojevich initates a bad Elvis impersonator.
In case you prefer the Elvis Presley version of "Treat Me Nice"
Senate Seat Back on Market Underused, yet worn from much sitting. Present owner named cannot handle continued use. May require repair and thorough cleaning. Scandal-stink discovered and will be leeched out. Prefer to sell to part of the Chicago Machine. Experience not necessary. Will trade for favors and a draft pick yet to be named. Attorney Generals not welcome.
CHICAGO - Ousted Gov. Rod Blagojevich doesn't seem to mind being the butt of a theatrical joke.
Blagojevich got in on the joke Saturday evening, appearing as himself in a comedy show that lampoons the rise and fall of his own political career.
He opened The Second City's "Rod Blagojevich Superstar," a parody of the rock opera "Jesus Christ Superstar," standing on a chair with his arms raised as if he were being crucified.
The show -- which portrays Blagojevich as greedy, tactless and hair-obsessed -- opened in February and was supposed to end June 14. But production officials extended it to Aug. 9 due to constant sold-out performances.
There once was a crook from Chitown. Would sell his mother on downtown So when it came to his seat, he'd thought money he'd greet. Instead he got caught in a shakedown.
Barack Obama, disappointed the value of his Illinois Senate Seat only drew a paltry $S.ss (one soul, in US dollars, with no change), he has asked Roland Burris to return it.
The trouble, the value has further dropped, and the buyer will need to toss in manhood as well to confirm the purchase. Immediately, this brought to mind Hillary Clinton. She is an expert carpetbagger, but already has take a position, thanks to Kelly Temporary Services' secretary division. There was some confusion in the matter, as she is Secretary of State. Jesse White thought she wanted his job, and offered her a driver's licence to lay off. Husband Bill Clinton reminded him he was unsuccessful with the same thing.
Meanwhile, Mr. Burris continues his "I'm not listening" tour, which involves press avoidance, lies, malarkey and Oprah watching. Burris has declared he has no intention of returning the seat.
Not unexpectedly, MSNBC is delighted to report that Illinois Democrats still believe he might be innocent. They said that about Rod Blagovich too, and so all results are favorable. Their circle will not go unbroken.
The spoils of Illinois' governor war are going to Pat Quinn. A Democrat claiming to be anti-machine, his political Ludditism will be put the the test immediately in a state known more for its machine than its integrity.
Though a Roman Catholic by faith, no one expects his religion to make a difference in his leadership; he is divorced, a Democrat and a lawyer. Faith has not impacted his public life this far. Abortion laws are not expected to change accordingly.
The headaches he inherits will produce the need for much pillage, as well as sleepage.
Former Governor Rod Blagovich recommends the following products that helped him sleep well, starting with House and Philosophy: Everybody Lies (The Blackwell Philosophy and Pop Culture Series). "What Quinn needs to do is think about his health. I run every morning, and found only the fittest reporters could catch me. Be on the lookout for wiretaps."
Sold - Barack Obama's Senate Seat (Recently Off the Market) Democrats, finding themselves more negotiable, have purchased the Barack Obama seat. First put on the market by sometime governor and Senate real estate agent Rod Blagovich, it was quickly taken off when Democrats realized Blagovich was not asking enough.
The price was not disclosed, but it is rumored they gave it away in trade for votes to be named later, and possibly a key to executive bathroom, as many became sick during the transaction.